New chapter

Lately, it's not that I have no time to blog...I just haven't felt like doing it. I enjoy reading "all-ya'alls" blogs, just don't like to post on mine. Tonight I make an exception because I changed the background. That's all...just the background.

It's summertime for the big kids, but Tyler is still on track. It's been good, but I look forward to sleeping in (ya right).

Today my baby turned 4. It's weird to me because with the gap I have in my family, I have had all my kids in school, but I knew we weren't finished in the baby stage of life. This time....I'm pretty sure we are done. I am looking forward to sending a missionary out in 2 1/2 years and having my second child drive in 2 years. It's time to turn a page. Make no mistake, I'm glad to turn the page...little kids are hard for me. If you yell to loud, sometimes they cry....weird. But, it's feels different to be needed in a new way. Not less needed like I once assumed...just different.

Well, I need to put the finishing touches on my...I mean....Tyler's Great Brain project so that's all for now. Except one funny family thing.

-Tonight we were looking at pictures of Jason and came across his first day of preschool picture. He used to call it "pretty school" instead of preschool and since he's the 4th kid we didn't correct him. Anyways, Tyler said "I almost went to pretty school, but they took one look at me and realized that I didn't need it". He is so quick, he also has the delivery down cold. He didn't smile, just looked at us as if he was saying, "you know I'm right". He's 7. I'm in trouble. :)

The role of motherhood

AAAHHH....37!

So I turned 37 a few weeks ago. That sounds much older than 36 to me, for some weird reason. However, in the spirit of the birthday I will do the "list" of reasons I am grateful to be 37 and things I didn't know when I was younger.

-I had a rough year, I am grateful I will never be 36 again.

-hopefully I learned the lessons so I won't repeat all of my mistakes

-I am grateful to have teenagers. ( if I weren't so old, I wouldn't have them)

-I am grateful to still have small kids too, now that I'm older, I let some of the small stuff go

-I am learning that most things that upset me are small things

-I am working on letting go of the things that bother me about myself that I know I will never change.

- I am learning some lessons in life are about overcoming faults and some lessons are about enduring to the end and always getting up when you fall.

-The lord knows us all individually. my testimony of this is strengthened on this topic almost daily.

-He hears you when you pray and needs our help to help each other.

-I've learned not to ignore a prompting.

-Random thoughts pop in my head for a reason. The only time I ever have regrets about them is when I don't act on the thought.

-It hurts my feelings to hear people criticize others.

-I know I'm not perfect but I hope I am getting better about being more compassionate and understanding about others situations and problems.

-I am trying to learn how to show my children love in the way that they recognize it. I guess it's called their "love language"....I hear there's a book about it....maybe some day I'll read it.

-I've learned that when I say "maybe someday" I might as well say never. :) But it's the thought that counts.

-Sometimes it really is the thought that counts to me.

-tonight my 7 year old said I was an awful mom...10 years ago that would have made me cry. Tonight I simply (for 30 min) explained why I am not an awful mom just because I make him eat dinners that he doesn't like. Being 37 has given me confidence in my mothering skills so a comment like that doesn't manipulate me.

-if the same 7 year old winks at me and says I love you....than let the manipulation begin :)

-I've learned to stand up for myself.

- I've learned that"just because I can, doesn't mean I should"...dang it.

-I'm learning that life isn't only always about the big changes you make but the sum total of all the small ones.

-I love my family more than I ever could have imagined loving anything in my life.

-They are worth all the anxiety, worry or random name calling that I endure.

-it's a reminder that they are acting their respective ages....adjustments usually need to be made on my end.

-I have been with my husband now longer than I was without him, I am madly in love with him.

-over 20 years of being married to him or dating him has taught me that there is no one for me but Brent. I love him more that the day we were married.

I am tired for now, maybe I'll post more later....ya probably not.

you gotta love fast sunday

Prep for fast sunday

In preparation for fast sunday.

love at home

I found this funny....

too much take out...

You know your family has had too much take out food when you three year old says, "mommy, if you were in Heaven, who would pick up our food?" I'm glad food is his biggest concern in this sentence.

The stick broke......

I walked in my kitchen after having a deep talk with another child when Tyler says, "The stick broke....I had to use my finger!" I'm sure it will be green for a week. Who ever invented the Fun Dip is, in fact, a dip.

Sweethearts

Sweethearts was tonight at Riverton High School. Luckily my son dates nice girls so that cuts my anxiety down. I hope they have a blast! It looked like a fun group. His poor date had ginormously tall shoes cuz he's not exactly a small guy. Ahhh, to be a kid again....
A big thank you to Lisl Barney for making the corsage and boutonniere, it matched perfectly and looked amazing! I highly recommend her for your flower needs, she is AWESOME!!!! THANK YOU LISL!!!!

Life....

I have been thinking about the gift of the life that I have been given. It has been full of ups and downs, but I guess never a dull moment. The older my kids get I am realizing how precious time is. My kids will start leaving me very soon, after all this is what I am raising them for. To be productive members of society, have an unwavering testimony of the Savior and His Gospel, and to be kind to others by always returning good for evil. The trick is, have I personally done enough to prepare them for what lies ahead/ The answer....probably not. Not in a bad way, but I realize that personal experience is a far better teacher than parents yammering in their ears about their personal experience.
Over the past several months, I have been experiencing anxiety in levels that I am not used to. It has been a challenge for me to stay calm and hold in words that I wouldn't have said a year ago. Actually, I think things that are not like me either. I feel Satan's pull on me sometimes more than I feel the Spirit with me. And it seems the harder I try to change it, the harder it is to change. Life is a refining process and, let's just say...I am in the fire. And I want out but apparently I am not done yet. I have faith that the Lord knows what is best for me, I also know that I am being prepared for something, I just don't know what it is. That's okay with me, I know the Lord is with me.
Thanks for letting me ramble, I feel better now. :)

Finding 10 things to do:

I wanted to set some goals this year but be realistic about my ability and desire to accomplish the goals. I thought about many things, like organizing my home (which is the bane of my existence). And....okay just organizing. But seriously, I know myself. I can't do it. I lack the "know how" to be 100% organized. There are plenty of thing I want to do....in theory. But realistically, I know they won't happen because I have no desire to follow through. So, I came up with a few thing that I am passionate about that will challenge me a little and I will be able to commit to with integrity knowing that I have the ability and desire to do it. Here goes...

This year I am going to read the Book of Mormon 7 times. My old record (set in 2007) was 6, so I think I can add one more time. I need the personal guidance that I receive from the Holy Ghost that only comes through scripture study. I started today.

This year I am going to spend more one on one time with my husband. We don't date as often as we should and life is passing by us so quickly that I feel like our kids will soon start leaving us and we better like to spend time with each other.

This year I will make a more concentrated effort to give my children more responsibilities to help them prepare for their next phases in life. It's a sobering thought that Jared will be leaving on a mission in 2 1/2 years, and Katelyn will be (cough)dating. (makes me want to hurl just thinking about it.) If I knew 10 years ago what I know now, I wouldn't have taken time for granted . Luckily, I have 2 stragglers who will get the benefit of all my wisdom when they start hitting their teenage years in 6 and 9 years. For example, I want to teach my big kids to cook. Just a few meals so I know that Jared on his mission will have the knowledge to do more than make Ramen noodles.

I want to attend the temple more than I did last year, which fortunately for me won't be too hard. :) I haven't set a specific number or am even sure how I will accomplish this but I have a deep desire. When I was pregnant with Tyler I went every Tuesday to the temple. Little did I know that it would be 7 years before I could get back into a regular routine of going. It is a good thing I was comfortable resting on my laurels all these years or I may feel guilt. :)

This year I am going to be better at budgeting our money. I am learning techniques that I think will work for our family, and I would like to increase our saving.

Well, I could only come up with 5 so I guess that will have to do. BTW, I am always open to organizing suggestions. The ONLY area in my entire home that is organized is my phone desk drawers. I learned many years ago some tips from Lorenne (miss her!!!) on organizing your desk and she outlined a plan for a homemaking night. I loved it! It was simple and easy to maintain. I can copy, I just have no ideas on how to start.

finally...

Tomorrow is finally the funeral for Brent's granny. They had a lot of out of town people flying in so it was postponed a bit. I don't love funerals. I hate public crying(just for myself...you cry all you want) I figure if I am a mess I can't help someone who may need help. It's also nice to be in the "in-law" category. When my grandma or grandpa passes I know it will be more difficult.

I am trying to come up with a few goals I want to accomplish this year. I used to love resolutions. I think I out grew the need for them. Or maybe I just changed my focus, I try every day to be a little better. Some days I fail, sometimes I do okay.

Random: my left eyebrow is falling out. I thought it may be my thyroid...it isn't. My Dr. said it is stress. Brilliant...(sarcasm keys typing) how do I change that other than a good eyebrow pencil. It's a good thing that I have relied on my inner beauty for so long otherwise it may bug me. (and bangs) I wished that getting old didn't mean falling apart. I could do without that.

I miss my husband. Life is so loud that I barely get to talk to him anymore. I hope when things quiet down he still wants to talk to me.

Jared asked a girl to a dance, we are waiting for a reply. She wants to do something to his room which is good news for me cuz he finally has motivation to clean it. Hey, I'll take it where ever I can. Also, baseball started last night. we actually had a few months off this year which was nice.

Katelyn is still perfect. She got a cell phone for Christmas and was completely delighted!

Ty and Jason are still Ty and Jason. Except we skipped right over the terrible two's to the terrible three's. So...that's fun. (sarcasm keys are typing again)

Anyway, when I come up with my list of the 10 things I want to accomplish this year I will post it. Until then, I guess you will have to wait on pins and needles :)

Mother, Grandmother, and Great-Grandmother Gladys L. Mann was released from her failing earthly body on December 28, 2010 of causes incident to age, and is now experiencing the joy of reunion with her parents and family whom she had longed to see again. Gladys was born on October 29, 1927 to David Ross and Lillian Martin. She graduated from High School with a scholarship to college, a significant achievement at that time for a young woman. Gladys married Donald D. Mann at the age of 18 after meeting while working picking gooseberries. Their first home was in Colorado and moved to Utah in 1960. They later divorced. Gladys has seven children, 30 grandchildren, and 68 great grandchildren with more due in 2011. She was preceded in death by her parents, two sisters, and two brothers. Gladys was a strong willed and independent woman, as demonstrated by raising seven young children as a single mother while working full time to provide for them. Gladys has been a faithful and active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints since her conversion and baptism in1951, serving callings in the Relief Society and Primary. While she had her health, she attended the LDS Temple every Friday. Her unwavering faith and testimony through many hard times continues to influence and spread in the succeeding generations of her extended family. Gladys resided in the same home in Riverdale Utah for 47 years. Although not attained, Gladys’ desire was to teach school. Gladys retired from the IRS after 20 years of employment. She loved cold root beer, reading, and sitting in the warmth of the sun or in front of a heater. Gladys is survived by her children, Dale (Sue) Mann, Sandra (Roy) Barton, Dennis Mann, Cynthia Workman, Wendell (Muriel) Mann, Kathryn (Gary) Barton, Daniel (Sandee) Mann, and three sisters, Josephine, Leona, and Louise. The family expresses sincere gratitude to the Nurses, CNAs, and Aides at Heritage Care Center and from Inspiration Hospice for their infinite patience, for their many acts of caring and kindness, and for tender mercies. Brent's granny passed away today. She wasn't expected to make it through Christmas but hung on until this morning. She is a beautiful woman whom I have a tremendous amount of respect for. She had many health complications which caused her a great deal of pain but she was the epitome of grace and love. The pictures with our kids were taken in the hospital last week. She was very weak but was able to respond to us in her own way and we were all able to say goodbye for now. She is loved and will be missed by many, I feel lucky to gain one more guardian angel to watch over my family. Love you granny!

Christmas Jammies

Every year for Christmas my mom gives the grand kids jammies. This year they each got their favorite sport team. Of course all my kids are in BYU stuff, and my brother Nate, from TX, sent Texas longhorn jammies for my mom. It is really cute how they all get excited to change into the p.j.'s and get a picture. My mom has 20 grand kids now (2 out of town :( ) We had a super great Christmas unfortunately I didn't take any pictures. Jason kept saying "this is the BEST Christmas ever!!!" It was too cute. Thanks to grandma Rees for the fun tradition.

Things that make me happy

I decided to do a new list of things that make me happy. Mostly because since Brent broke his leg it is time for me to count my blessings.

It makes me happy to hear really good lines in songs. You know the kind that speak to your soul. For example, Bret Michaels, "sometimes I wished I didn't know now the things I didn't know then"...deep.

It makes me happy to serve my husband. I am just sorry he had to break his leg so I could. Most of our marriage has been him taking care of me after delivering babies of other various surgeries. I am glad to give back a little.

It makes me happy to see my older two kids making great choices. They have a good head on their shoulders and I love so much the good things about them.

It makes me happy to see Jason and Tyler have so much fun in life. Their life revolves around being entertained and having fun. Pretty soon that will be gone so I play with them as much as I can because I know I will miss when they don't need me anymore.

It makes me happy to have my computed run fast. It's a little thing but makes me smile.

The holidays make me very happy! I love Santa, I love getting together with families and enjoying the spirit of the holidays.

My brothers and sisters and mom make me happy. I am glad we are all close in the sense that we enjoy each others company and like to get together. They all mean so much to me, I am glad my kids get to know their aunts and uncles.

I have lost 25 lbs since June. Not that it makes me happy cuz really I was happy before but I am glad I did it. now if I gain Christmas weight I won't feel too bad!

The new maverick by my house makes me happy. Remember when we had to go ALL THE WAY to Harmon's for milk? Those days are over...

Bed time makes me happy. I love the kids but when they all go to bed and it is quiet, I can talk to Brent. I love to talk to him.

Brent makes me happy. He's my best friend, he's my rock, and I rely on him for so much. I don't want to think about what I would do without him, I need him.

I am happy the kids aren't sick. We were all a bit sick for a few weeks but for now everyone is well. (knock on wood)

Ipods make me happy. Whenever I need to check out of life for a minute I throw in my headphones and I listen to a song to help me calm down and than I am good to go again. I love music.

I feel so blessed and happy to have such wonderful friends. You all mean a lot to me, you may have know idea how much I admire each and everyone of you for your many different strengths. I learn from your successes and hope to be like you in so many ways. Love you all!

saturday confessionsal

Confession is good for the soul right? I read a blog sometimes that includes confession friday. Since it's saturday, technically I'm not copying....

I confess:
-coping blogs doesn't bother me
-I mean, I can't be original all the time
-I am trying to keep better track of my life
-when I think of something I need to do I write it down so I don't forget
-it's working well unless I forget the writing part
-maybe someday I'll invent the "to do" list lol
-it's amazing having a teenage driver in the house
-it's helped me make my maverick trip more fun
-since I don't have to go in looking like....well...how I look everyday except sunday
-Phineas and Ferb is my favorite show
-those two crack me up!
-I was so bored the other day I re read my blog.
-sometimes I'm funny...juss sayin'
-I finally started Christmas shopping
-one present down......tons to go
-we usually get around to setting up our tree around mid December
-but we take it down RIGHT after Christmas
-I am starting to like shoe shopping....especially boots
-every time I say "cute boots" my daughter giggles uncontrollably
-no THAT'S not what I am saying....wonder where she gets that from
-my rebellious streak is getting harder to suppress the older I get.
-but I am still trying, most days
-I bought fake eyelashes
-I'll admit, it helps my self esteem
-I like to watch Jerseylicious
-it has no redeeming qualities....what are you gonna do...
-sometimes I am a slacker, I don't like it...it just happens
-if cleanliness is next to Godliness than I'm in trouble

Wow, I do feel better, it is nice to unload

who would win in a fight?

Iron man or Super Man

random halloween/birthday stuff

Tyler's b day is a few days before halloween, he was excited to turn 8...unfortunately, he turned 7. :) He's excited to get baptized....
Anyways, to know me is to know how much I love Halloween. (not much) However, I did spring for new costumes this year because nothing fit the kids in the costume box. Brent and the kids carved the pumpkins, and luckily Brent remembered to snap a few pics before we left for trick or treating. We did have fun walking around with the boys, they get so excited! At the scary houses Jason would say, "let's not go there, that house is creeping me out." So we skipped the freaky ones. Katelyn had her last year of Trick or treating, she decided a few hours before it was time to go that she wanted to do it, so she used a poodle skirt from an activity days thing a from few years ago, and went as a fifties gal.
I have always had D track so we miss the Halloween parade every year. I do, however, love Christmas so I will be getting excited for that soon I bet. :)

girls pref

Jared had a plate of brownies delivered to our door one day and inside were letters that spelled the name of the girl who was asking him to girls pref. After an hour of digging and guessing and hoping he didn't eat a letter he figured out who asked him. It was our neighbor Cassidy. They are good friends and girls pref was on her 16th birthday. They ended up going with a group of 16 kids. It sounds like they had a blast! Jared was impressed with their creative ways to have fun without spending a lot of money. I think if Jared were a rich man he would date every day.
I am thankful for the good group of friends that he has to hang out with. So far 2 of the 3 girls he's been out with are in our ward (my sunday school class) so it's nice to see him having fun and dating with idea of not getting serious with anyone yet. (Yes, I know that could all go out the window one day when some little hottie steals him away...but for now, I am glad he is making good dating choices)

made me laugh....